The role of a father during a child’s formative years is crucial, especially for daughters. Fathers are pillars of discipline and stability, and their presence often shapes how children view relationships, authority, and themselves. But when a father is absent due to circumstances like death or relocation, a masculine figure is often needed to fill that void. Here are some key reasons why men should consider this factor when deciding to commit to a woman:
1. Lack of Submission
Women who didn’t grow up with a father or masculine role model often struggle with the idea of submission in relationships. They may see submission as synonymous with weakness or subjugation. Without having observed a healthy, authoritative male presence, they may resist their husband’s leadership, leading to frequent conflict. Submission in this context isn’t about inequality; rather, it’s about mutual respect and balance. A woman who has never experienced this balance may see submission as a form of oppression, making a harmonious relationship difficult.
2. Poor Perception of Men
Women raised by single mothers, particularly if those mothers hold negative views toward men, may develop a skewed perspective. If their mother harbors resentment toward their absent father, she may unintentionally pass on these negative beliefs. This can create deep-seated mistrust of men, leading a woman to project her mother’s bitterness onto future partners. As a result, her partner may feel emotionally drained from constantly trying to prove himself as a good man.
3. Lack of Discipline
Fathers are often the primary disciplinarians in a household, setting boundaries and enforcing rules. When a woman grows up without this, she may lack the structure and discipline that fathers typically instill. Mothers, while nurturing, may not always set firm limits. This absence of discipline during childhood can lead to poor behavior or attitudes in adulthood. A woman raised without a father may struggle with authority and responsibility, complicating her future relationships.
4. Poor Decision-Making in Relationships
For many girls, their father is their first example of love and how a man should treat them. A woman who grows up with a strong father figure has a reference point for what healthy love looks like, helping her make better relationship choices. Without this foundation, a woman may struggle to distinguish between genuine love and manipulation, leaving her vulnerable to heartbreak and emotional baggage, which can complicate future relationships.
5. Low Self-Esteem
A father plays a key role in building a daughter’s self-esteem. Without his affirmation, a woman may struggle with feelings of inadequacy or low self-worth, leading her to seek validation in unhealthy ways. This insecurity can become a source of tension in a marriage, where the fear of rejection or a constant need for reassurance creates emotional strain on both partners.
Conclusion
While it’s possible for women raised by single mothers to thrive, the presence of a masculine figure—whether a father, uncle, or mentor—can make a significant difference in how they approach relationships. Men considering commitment should be mindful of how a woman’s upbringing shapes her views on authority, discipline, and self-worth. If her mother successfully instilled these values, a man may find a stable and fulfilling partnership. But if her upbringing reflects the absence of a strong masculine influence, it’s worth considering the potential challenges ahead.
Unfortunately, absence of father is what has happened to many homes. I love the word…balance. I have used it already before I came here. Death, separation, divorce, jobs etc have taken father’s away from homes. Death took my father before I can recognise his father. Till today, the mark is on me. Uncle’s were no where to be found and my mother is the only surviving child of her parents and an orphan too. I appreciate this write up. And I will advice any mother who her marriage has ended never to let her children hate their father. Their happiness in their future marriage will be in jeopardy.